Dr Rhoberta Shaler: The Voice of Clarity in Toxic Relationships
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Behavior |
What It Looks Like |
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Constant Blame |
Never takes responsibility, always your fault |
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Gaslighting |
Twists facts to make you question reality |
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Public Charm |
Acts kind in public, cruel in private |
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Emotional Manipulation |
Uses guilt, shame, or fear to control |
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Control of Narrative |
Rewrites events to suit their version |
Who Exactly Is Dr. Rhoberta Shaler?
Dr. Rhoberta Shaler is a well-known name in the relationship wellness space. She holds a PhD in psychology and brings over 40 years of experience to the table. Her work is centered around helping people break free from emotionally abusive relationships, especially those involving manipulative or high-conflict individuals.
- Professional background: Dr. Shaler has worked as a counselor, educator, mediator, and conflict-resolution specialist with clients worldwide.
- Approach to relationships: She focuses on practical advice, not just psychological theory. Instead of clinical terms, she uses plain language to help people recognize the toxic behaviors affecting their lives.
- Mission: She aims to give people the tools and clarity they need to regain control and rebuild their confidence after dealing with toxic relationships.
What Does “Hijackal®” Mean?
Dr. Shaler created the term “Hijackal®” to describe individuals who hijack relationships for their own gain and then scavenge them for power, control, and validation. These people don’t always meet clinical definitions of narcissism or sociopathy, but their behavior is damaging and confusing.
- Common traits of Hijackals®: They shift blame, deny responsibility, manipulate others emotionally, and often act kind in public but cruel behind closed doors.
- Why the term matters: The term helps people talk about toxic behavior patterns without needing a diagnosis. It focuses on how people act, not what they’re labeled as.
- The benefit for readers: Understanding this behavior gives people the language and clarity to take action in their relationships—whether with a partner, parent, friend, or colleague.
The Kinds of Things She Specializes In
Dr. Shaler has built her entire career around helping people escape the grip of high-conflict relationships. Her work isn’t about vague advice—it’s about specific, actionable strategies.
- Emotional abuse education: She helps people spot manipulation, control tactics, and psychological games before they escalate.
- Communication skills: She teaches how to respond to Hijackals® without getting pulled into their drama. This is especially helpful for people still living with or working alongside toxic individuals.
- Family and work dynamics: Many of her clients are dealing with toxic parents, siblings, or coworkers. She offers strategies for handling these relationships in a way that protects your mental health.
- Recovery coaching: After someone leaves a toxic relationship, the emotional damage can linger. Dr. Shaler helps people rebuild boundaries, self-esteem, and long-term peace.
What Resources Does She Offer?
Dr. Shaler has made it easy for people to get the help they need, no matter where they are. Her content is available across different formats to meet different learning styles and life circumstances.
- YouTube channel: Called “The Relationship Help Doctor,” her channel features hundreds of videos on topics like gaslighting, narcissistic abuse, and emotional manipulation.
- Podcast series: Her podcast “Save Your Sanity” is filled with personal stories, practical advice, and bite-sized episodes covering all aspects of toxic relationships.
- Books and guides: She’s written several books including Kaizen For Couples and Escaping the Hijackal Trap, both designed to help people understand relationship abuse and learn how to recover.
- Coaching sessions: Dr. Shaler offers one-on-one video consultations for people needing personal support. These sessions are private, customized, and focused on actionable next steps.
- Online support community: She runs a virtual membership group called Emerging Empowered™, where members can share experiences, access exclusive materials, and get guidance directly from her.
Why Dr. Shaler’s Work Stands Out Today
There’s a growing awareness around narcissistic abuse and emotional manipulation, but not everyone knows how to deal with it when it shows up in their personal life. That’s where Dr. Shaler comes in—she cuts through the noise with language that’s clear and relatable.
- Real-world relevance: Her advice isn’t just for romantic relationships—it applies to family issues, workplace dynamics, and long-term toxic friendships.
- Focus on behaviors: By moving away from diagnostic labels, she makes it easier for people to identify destructive behavior and set boundaries without needing to prove anything to a therapist or doctor.
- Tools for recovery: She doesn’t stop at awareness. She equips people with strategies for rebuilding their lives after years of manipulation and self-doubt.
How You Can Get in Touch or Learn More
Dr. Shaler offers multiple ways to engage with her work depending on what kind of support you’re looking for. Everything is designed to be accessible, easy to understand, and practical.
- Official website: ForRelationshipHelp.com is where you’ll find her booking calendar, free tools, and all of her digital content in one place.
- Podcast and video access: You can find her on all major podcast platforms and YouTube, with new content added regularly.
- Community support: The Emerging Empowered™ group offers a private online space to connect with others going through similar struggles.
- Private coaching: You can book a one-on-one session with her directly through her site, whether you’re dealing with a crisis or planning your long-term recovery.
Conclusion
Dr. Rhoberta Shaler has spent her life helping people see through the emotional fog created by manipulative and controlling relationships. Whether you’re still caught in one or trying to heal from the damage, she offers the tools to guide you toward clarity, strength, and self-respect. Her approach is all about understanding behavior, making smart decisions, and reclaiming your peace of mind. If you’re ready to understand what’s really going on in your relationship and take steps toward freedom, her work is a great place to start.
Key takeaway: Dr. Shaler gives people the language and support they need to name toxic behavior, set boundaries, and move forward with confidence—without needing a diagnosis or long therapy journey.
FAQs
How does Dr. Shaler’s coaching work for international clients?
Her coaching is delivered through video calls, making it accessible to people anywhere in the world. She also offers downloadable resources and an online community for continuous support.
Is the Hijackal® term used in official psychology circles?
No, it’s a proprietary term coined by Dr. Shaler. It’s not a clinical diagnosis but a useful label to help people recognize toxic behaviors quickly and clearly.
Can she help someone who’s still living with a toxic person?
Yes, many people work with Dr. Shaler while still in the relationship. She offers practical strategies to manage the situation, stay emotionally grounded, and prepare for possible exits.
What makes her different from traditional therapists?
Her approach is focused on patterns of behavior, not on diagnosing disorders. She uses plain language and offers tools people can apply right away, which makes her work more actionable.
Does she work with people in corporate settings?
Absolutely. She advises professionals dealing with manipulative coworkers, supervisors, or business partners. Her framework applies to both personal and workplace conflict.
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